UNLUCKY NUMBER 7
(8/7/23) There is always one…Sitting at the sportsbook, you can’t help but always hear the one guy that says “I knew the Texans was going to win and took them on the money line at +750”. He wants everyone in the sportsbook to know how great he. In realtiy he has nothing on the game and just full of hot air and just all talk. Tim Anderson is that guy in baseball. This guy came into the league and right of the bat was spewing nonsense on how special he was going to be.
Tim Anderson said:
“I’m going to be the best, I don’t know when, I don’t know how, but I know what to do, nobody can outwork me, and I’m determined to get there. It may not be this year; it may not be next year. But it’s coming.”
The baseball world is still waiting for him to arrive……After 10 years, he is just mediocre…never having more than 20hrs in a season and never having more than 65 RBIs in a season. His only accomplishement has been 1 batting title. For the 2023 season as of today, he has amass a whopping 1 homerun and a batting average of .244 and 19 RBIs. His RBIs are not even old enough to drink. I thought he said he knows what to do and nobody can outwork him. Its time to pull back the curtain on this guy. Tim Anderson is just a cocky, loudmouth, self centered and overrated player. It is also safe to say, people around baseball doesn’t exactly like this guy and his bat flipping antics. So unless you have been stuck watching Barbie or Oppenheimer..there was a fight between Tim Anderson and Jose Ramirez where the baseball gods were guiding Ramirez’s fist into Anderson’s face.
Following the fight, Anderson tweeted and deleted this beauty…
Just like Ja Morant….Is this gangster Timmy coming out? . He is going to catch up with Ramirez later??? What does that mean? Are they going out for beer and pizza to share baseball stories? Or is Tim Anderson going to lurk in the dark hallways of the Indian’s clubhouse to exact revenge on Ramirez? Anderson no doubt is embarassed by being knocked out and needs to protect his image.
MLB needed an unlikely hero to rise up and protect the game and mild-mannered Jose Ramirez step up and delivered the punch that would cause celebrations throughout the clubhouses in the league and laughter throughout social media. When Anderson dropped his glove and squared up, he wanted to show the world he is not just a baseball player but also a deadly fighter. Once again Anderson doesn’t know what he is doing. Anderson pretended he knows how to fight. Anderson stood with his right foot forward and threw a punch with his right hand. If you are right handed, you need to stand with your righ foot back and your left foot forward so you can rotate your hips and shoulder to punch. Basically Anderson was punching like a girl. Perhaps we should call him Tammy Anderson from now on.
Fights with punches being thrown doesn’t happen often in baseball but this fight was good for baseball and a good lesson for kids around the country who are going to head back to school in a couple of weeks. To back a bully off, sometimes all it takes is a good punch.
“INADVERTENTLY”
(8/14/22) The Joker killed a guy with a disappearing pencil trick and John Wick once killed 3 people also with a pencil. Who would have thought pencils are lethal weapons. It would also be next level bad ass if John Wick in his next movie kills someone with an eraser. So what does this have to do with anything? Well, we are half way through Summer vacation and soon enough kids will be back in classes holding pencils. Speaking of school, Fernando Tatis Jr. needs to go back to school and learn a few things because this guy is not exactly Princeton material and to put it kindly an idiot.
Tatis Jr. was caught using Clostebol and has been suspended for 80 games for violating MLB’s drug policy. Clostebol is a steriod. The Padres are not happy one bit because they are trying to make a deep run in the playoffs after trading for Soto. Of course like everyone that gets busted, Tatis Jr. said he “inadvertently” didn’t know that the ringworm medication he took had Clostebol. I once also “inadvertently” carried a flat screen TV out of the store without paying…its called theft and its not an excuse. Please spare us the excuse Fernando. How many times does MLB need to tell its players that if you don’t want to get in trouble for banned substances they can always ask MLB if something is ok to take. This is not a difficult concept to understand and can solve 99% of “inadvertently” taking something illegal. You give a guy $340 million and he is not smart enough to do this or follow simple directions? The only explanation left is Tatis Jr. wanted to pull one pass MLB.
We never want to see anyone make stupid mistakes so here a list of what is ok and what is not ok. Someone please pass along this list to Tatis or his agent. We wouldn’t want to see him get caught again using PEDs.
1.Gatorade-SAFE!!
2.Phencyclidine (PCP)- NO!! YOU WILL BE BANNED!
3.Cocaine-NO!! YOU WILL BE BANNED!
4.Oatmeal cookie-SAFE!!
5.Amphetamine –NO!! YOU WILL BE BANNED
6.Mefenorex-NO!! YOU WILL BE BANNED
7.Burger-SAFE!!
8.Movie Nachos with Salsa and Cheese-SAFE!!
9.LSD-NO!! YOU WILL BE BANNED
10.HGH-NO!! YOU WILL BE BANNED
11.Sour Patch Kids-SAFE!!
12. Dehydrochloromethyltestosterone –NO!! YOU WILL BE BANNED
13.Pu Pu Platter for 2-SAFE!!
12.Clostebol-NO!! YOU WILL BE BANNED! of course you know this..
We hope this list helps out Tatis Jr. MLB deserves all the credit in the world for suspending Tatis Jr who was suppose to be the next face of MLB. This guy was going to be another **eye rolled** “special” player and the Padres gave him $340 million dollar. Tatis Jr. thought he was untouchable and that MLB would just sweep this under the rug and “privately” gives him a warning. The good news is that the MLB Cheaters Club has a new member.
NEED AN INTERPRETER
(7/14/21) Why does ESPN keep putting up with Steven A. Smith. He comes across constantly as this angry guy who wants people to think he is always right by talking as loud as he can. He blows a lid whenever a white coach is hired. He constantly talks about racial discrimination yet he himself comes across as a racist.
A few days ago Smith open his mouth and out came these stupid words about Shohei Ohtani.
Steven A. Smith: “When you talk about an audience gravitating to the tube, or to the ballpark, to actually watch you, I don’t think it helps that the No. 1 face is a dude that needs an interpreter so you can understand what the hell he’s saying, in this country. And that’s what I’m trying to say.”
He also said this…
Steven A. Smith: “doesn’t speak English, that needs an interpreter, believe it or not, I think contributes to harming the game to some degree”
Harming the game to a degree? Is Steven A. Smith serious? If you hit 33 homeruns at the break and not to mention he is also a pitcher, you are a star regardless if you speak English. I want the guy that can hit a ton of homeruns to be on my team over the guy that can speak fluent English who is batting .200 and has 5 homeruns at the All Star break. Stats matter in baseball and if you have 60 homeruns at the end of the year it doesn’t matter if you can spell “cat” or form a English sentence from your mouth into a microphone. Numbers matter in baseball.
People just love to watch athletes perform just for entertainment. People would actually prefer that athletes don’t talk because most of the time the words coming out of their mouths are useless especially when they bring politics into the picture. Ohtani is content with being quiet and hitting homeruns unlike some athletes that gets upset when told to shut up and dribble.
Who cares if he needs an interpreter. Steven A. Smith is probably going to need an interpreter himself whenever he visits Japan or some other Asian countries because the Japanese people sure are going to have a hard time understanding the words coming from this loudmouth. All they hear are loud noises and spits flying everywhere.
Someone needs to remind Steven A. Smith that he forgot to include the “promise to do better” in his apology statement.
NOT IMPRESSED
(5/23/21) “Not one”, “Not two”, “Not three”…..We are not talking about Lebron James and his championships prediction when he was with the Miami Heat. We are talking about the number of no-hitters that is happening almost on a weekly basis in baseball. The current count is 6 no-hitters thus far in the season and there will be more plenty to come.
Here is the list of pitchers who threw a no-hitter this year:
- Joe Musgrove
- Carlos Rondon
- John Means
- Wade Miley
- Spencer Turnbull
- Corey Kluber
5 years ago….on a no-hitter
Everyone’s reaction: Amazing!! Incredible!! What a special moment!!
Current year 2021…on a no-hitter
Everyone’s reaction: *meh*..not impress...dime a dozen.
No-hitter is becoming something so common even regular people can just get on the mound and throw a no hitter.
10 year old little leaguer: “I only throw 5 mile an hour, can I throw a no-hitter in the Majors?
Playbook:”can you reach home plate? if yes, yes!! you too can throw a no-hitter”
Lifelong 45 year old Minor Leaguer (still playing in the minors): “my era in the minors is 14.99, can I come up and throw a no-hitter ?
Playbook:”get that era down to 5.99 and you too can throw a no-hitter “
Joe Schmoe: “I throw a great BBQ and grill the best hot dogs, can I throw a no-hitter ?
Playbook:”do you have those perfect grill marks on those hot dogs? if yes,sure!! you too can throw a no-hitter!”
It’s obvious why so many no hitters are happening. Its call social distancing and its happening in sports. Baseball and bats are being socially responsible. They are avoiding each other because we are turning the corner on Covid and everyone and thing must do their part. So next time you hear there is a no-hitter in progress, there is no need to change the channel because you might miss history. History will be happening on a weekly basis
WELCOME BACK
(3/31/21) “Welcome back!”..often means that people are excited to have you back. Fans are slowly allowed back in the stands and owners couldn’t be any happier. This is great news for sports fans everywhere. This is better news for owners. For owners, nothing beats seeing the Brinks truck backing up onto the loading dock and having armed men carrying boat loads of your cash into the truck. What owners really miss is his best friend Benjamin Franklin.
Apparently, the more things changed the more they remain the same. It’s great that owners have put in added precautions to keep everyone safe. The problem is I have not heard one single thing that owners are doing to really welcome fans back. The ticket prices still remains the same. The concession prices still remains the same. To park still cause you an arm and a leg. Owners pretty much are still greedy and wants to price gauge you at every opportunity. So let’s see what these owners really think when we inject them with truth serum.
Truth Serum Injected
Owner: “we missed having fans in our stands”
After truth serum: “Thank goodness these suckers are back. Someone needs to pay for the fuel for my yacht and private plane. That mansion ain’t paying for itself”
Owner: “Nothing beats watching live games”
After truth serum: “If fans are watching at home, how are we going to price gouge them? These guys will pay $10 for a bottle of spring water. Can you say profit margin of 10000 percent? It’s like the casino, keep them on location and eventually we will separate the money from the wallet”
Owners are all about greed. Ticket prices keeps going up. Concession prices keeps going up. The pandemic ain’t stopping the greed. These guys want to continue to live like fat cats with their boats, planes and automobiles. Why don’t these owners show some appreciation for their fans instead of laughing behind that scene that they are so stupid to pay $10 for a bottle of water. How about welcoming back fans with $1 tickets even if its for just one game. How about charging $1 for that soft drink. Would it hurt these owners to just be kind and not always think about the bottom line?
So the next time when you hear an owner talk about how great it is to have fans back know that all he hears in his head is *cha-ching, cha-ching* the sound of the cash register ringing.
OH GEEZ
(2/21/21) “Oh geez” are two words in the English dictionary you never want to hear. No good has ever come from anyone saying “Oh geez”. It is never ever good news. When the San Diego Padres signed Fernando Tatis Jr. to a 14-year $340 million contract, the first words that came out of my mouth was “Oh geez”.
What are the Padres front office thinking? This will go down as one of the worst contract ever in MLB history. The Padres must have been bored during quarantine and now just wants some attention with this ridiculous announcement. They want to lock him up for 14 years? Maybe they should lock up the person that was dumb enough to give him that contract. Why stop at 14 years San Diego? You love him so much why don’t you just give him a 30 year contract for $1 trillion dollar. This is a panic move by an organization that has won zero World Series and deserve to never win one in the next 100 years. In 5 years, the Padres will be looking to trade him. Baseball is the toughest sport to be productive consistently. You can be batting .300 for one month and the next month you are batting .100 and looking for a psychologist because mentally your brain is fried because you are stuck in a 2 for 50 slump at the plate. When will owners ever learn to never give out large contracts. They never ever ever ever work out. The exception may be Mike Trout.
If I ever visit San Diego, my first choice would not be buying tickets to the Padres. Instead, I would buy a ticket to the San Diego Zoo and have more fun feeding the residents there. I would then spend a day over at Sea World and grab a late dinner at their seafood restaurant where most of their “untrainables” help generate sales in a different way.
OVER 100 YEARS OF MAKE NO SENSE
(10/16/20) They say baseball is a chess game and a thinking man’s game. This is certainly true but there are certain things that makes me think that these guys doesn’t really think at all. They are stuck in the same mindset for over 100 years and refuse to evolve in their thinking. I am talking about just letting the runner at first steal second base uncontested.
Let’s set up the scenario from last night’s playoff game. The Braves was leading the Dodgers in the seventh inning by the score of 7-2 with two outs. The Dodgers had runners on first and third. The runner on first Cody Bellinger takes off for second base and the second baseman and shortstop did not move an inch. The Braves pretty much is giving Bellinger second base without a throw. Bellinger could have done the “worm” to second base. This situation always drives me bonkers. It just makes no sense at all.
This is what I think teams should do unless its the ninth inning and you are up by a large margin with two outs. Teams should always always try to get the runner going to second. Giving up that free base is just plain dumb. If you do nail him at second then the inning is over. If you just let him steal second and try to get the batter out there is a slight problem. The batter can jack a 3-run homer and make the score 7-5 with 2 innings to go. A single now is going to drive in 2 runs and make the game much closer. Basically, its a free play for the catcher to get the final out and strand the batter. Some people say the runner at third might break for home and score an easy run. 99% of the time, teams will not risk pulling a double steal in this scenario late in the game.
By letting the runner get to second, there is also the real possibility that he relays the location of pitches to the batter. If I am a pitcher, I would step off and try to pick off the runner and not give the hitter a chance to hurt my ERA.
Outs are a premium in baseball and if you can get some easy outs you should.
UNWRITTEN RULE
(8/20/20) Its time we take baseball’s unwritten rule and throw it into the imaginary trash can. Every year in baseball, there are teams crying about runs being piled on. They expect teams with a big lead late in the game to stop trying so hard. They don’t want to be embarrassed when looking at the final score. If I was a manager, I will never ever want to lose a game when I am leading big in the 8th inning. I want my players to keep playing hard until the other team has a .00000001% chance of coming back. I want a 15 run lead in the ninth. I don’t want the other team to come back and stick the label of “chokers” right on my forehead.
I see no problem with the unwritten rule of not piling up runs only under one circumstance. The other team must give up and not try to come back. I want my pitcher to throw 3 straight ball down the middle for strikes and the hitter to just stand there. It doesn’t make sense for a team to ease up so the other team can have a chance to come back. We see teams come back from big leads before. These are big league hitters and all it takes is a 3-run homer or a reliever that can’t find the strike zone and things can quickly turn.
The unwritten rule is affecting individual players. If I am batting .200 and my team is up by 8 runs in the 8th inning. I would not want to just stand there and not try to get a hit. What if I was in a 3-30 slump? You want me to take 3 called strikes and sit down because of the unwritten rule. Who is looking out for me when I get sent down to the minors?
This is professional sports. Everyone does not go home with a trophy. Contracts in baseball are all about stats. I am padding my stats every chance I get. If feelings are hurt then teams should have a clown in the clubhouse to cheer them up after the game.
MORE CRAZY TALK
(8/11/20) Another edition of Athletes Crazy Talk.
You want to live life filled with joy and happiness? You want to run along the shores of a beach in slow motion during a beautiful sunset? It is all possible if you know the secret of life. The key is knowing who are the good people and bad people and stay away from the bad people. Its as simple as it gets to a life of happiness.
Ramon Laureano of the Oakland Athletics apparently is clueless in who are the good people and bad people. Laureano got hit by a pitch, charged the Astros dugout and resulted in a bench clearing brawl. So far everything seems fine but here is where the problem lies.
Ramon Laureano: “The other days I’ve been on base, we’ve been chitchatting, talking about life and family on the bases,” … “Everything’s great. I get along with everybody on the Astros.”
WHAT?!! COME AGAIN? Was this guy the only non-Astro player in the whole league that got invited to the Astros Summer BBQ Bonanza? He must be the most forgiving person in the whole world.
Ramon, if you are reading this…the Astros are bad people. They cheated baseball. Imagine if Laureano’s cousin was called up and was facing the Astros who knew every single pitch that was coming. He gets hammered for 9 runs in one inning, gets sent back to the minors and have recurring nightmares. Is Laureano going to think differently of the Astros??
Everybody was affected by the cheating. His own team the Athletics was also affected. Hey Ramon, have you had a chance to talk to Mike Fiers? He is a few lockers down. The Dodgers and Yankees would love to have Laureano as a teammate.
When he charged the Astros dugout, his teammates should have just stayed put. It would have been funny if he was the only Athletic player surrounded by all Astros. Nothing was going to happen. Remember this quote?
“Everything’s great. I get along with everybody on the Astros.”
He is the worst teammate that a team can have. Someone who thinks of himself only and lives in his own happy place. After the game he probably demanded that he is allow to head over to the Astros locker room so he can talk to them about life and family.
This guy makes me sick..I need to go puke.
SO YOU WANT TO BREAK THE RULES
(8/10/20) A famous philosopher once said: “If you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime”. Those words should be scrolling through your head when you are about to commit larceny, arson, murder, simple assault etc.
Zach Plesac of the Cleveland Indians was caught breaking protocols by going out with buddies in Chicago. No matter how much MLB stress the important of following health and safety protocols, there will always be players that simply do not care. The Cardinals had players who wanted some excitement and decided to roll the dice at the casino. It’s time to stop this nonsense.
Tough measures has to be taken. Stop with the Mickey Mouse of having to quarantine for 3 days. This form of punishment is absolutely useless and players just take it as a mini vacation. Players will stop acting stupid if the price to pay is outrageous. We are here to offer MLB a helping hand and a guarantee plan that will work 100%.
One. You lose the rest of your salary for the year and is suspended for the remainder of the season and possibly longer.
Two. Your name and mugshot gets plastered on a big board titled “Dummies that can’t follow the rules”
Three. Every game after the national anthem, the names and infractions of every player on the “Dummies that can’t follow the rules” board will be read by the broadcasters.
Four. A laugh track will be use when the names are being read.
Five. You will be locked in a warehouse by MLB making personal protective equipment UNTIL there is a vaccine.
These may be drastic and inhumane measures to undertake but its necessary to combat stupidity and to protect players that do listen.
“WHERE’S YOENIS?”
(8/3/20) As a professional courtesy most people would give a 2 weeks notice if they are going to leave a company. Yoenis Cespedes influenced by Operation Warp Speed for a Covid-19 vaccine decides that he is going to warp speed pass the 2 weeks notice and decided to just quit immediately.
Yoenis Cespedes pulled a disappearing act and sent the NY Mets into panic mode. He literally packed up his luggage and just left. His hotel room was empty. I wonder did the team security check the bathroom to see if he had forgotten his toothbrush. Did Cespedes leave a few dollars on the night stand for the cleaning ladies? It would be great if we had a picture of the room. Was Cespedes messy? Did he fold his blanket nice and neat? Did he turn off the TV or left it on?
It turned out Cespedes was ok. He could have text the Mets and told them he just needed some alone time. Instead, we have an APB (all-points bulletin) looking for a 220 pound overpaid and often broken down outfielder on the New York Mess. After resurfacing, Cespedes decides to opt out thus bringing his career as a NY Mets to an end. This is good news for the other teams in MLB. Cespedes can bring magic to your team except it will be in the form of a disappearing act.
“FACE” THE MUSIC 
(7/30/20) When you have lawlessness in MLB what do you do? The answer is obvious. You pick up the phone and you call the “Punisher”. No, his name is not Frank Castle. His name is Joe Kelly. He is the justice enforcer that MLB needs. When he rides into town (takes the mound), evil shakes and pleads for mercy. He also does great face impressions to entertain the kids. He is needed to do the dirty work that most pitchers are afraid to do. 85 mph fastball to the butt and back??? Those are reserve for amateurs.
The Houston Astros are sending lavish gifts to Rob Manfred for suspending the “Punisher” for 8 games. For 8 games, Astros players are now able to leave their house without looking over their shoulders or the need to duck. The 8 games is a travesty while no Astros players got any game suspension for their cheating. MLB wants to also send a message to the rest of the league to take it easy on the Astros. Seriously MLB? You are creating more hostility and just upsetting more players in the league. You think the “Punisher” is going to become soft after this and changes career and become a nanny?? No way in *a hot fiery place*. Right now he is very angry and stocking up on more of his trademark black T-shirt with the skull because he is going to have a lot of wardrobe changes because of all the Astros’ stains his shirt will have when he comes back.
Adults love what he stands for. Kids love his great face impressions. Everyone loves Joe. The Astros love him to retire. All cheaters need to be aware that as long as Joe Kelly is on a roster, be afraid, be very afraid.
MLB EARLY IMPRESSIONS
(7/22/20) It’s better to be late than never. Baseball is back to its “Glory Days” even if its for a short time. Baseball looks like baseball pre-pandemic minus the fans. Not much have changed. The camera angles are the same. They still show individual player stats, pitch counts etc. The in between graphics between batter and outs was smooth. The scoreboard in the park is on and updated with player stats. The fake crowd noise sounds pretty decent and not overwhelming or a distraction. Without fans, it looks like are you watching a game after a 5-hour rain delay with nobody left in the stands. It doesn’t feel weird with no fans there.
The quality of play is very good and you barely notice any drop off from the long layoff. Players don’t really look rusty. No one looked completely loss at the plate and striking out 4 times in a row. Defense wasn’t sloppy. There were errors around the league but it wasn’t glaring. Sharp ground balls were fielded cleanly. Outfielders didn’t make any careless mistakes tracking fly balls. Outfielders were hitting their cutoff guys.
The broadcast team did a pretty good job providing analysis and working together as a team. Remember these guys are not even in the same location. They are calling these games from their homes and not at the ballpark. They get one feed from the game to work with.
MLB has done a very impressive job and looked like they are in mid-season form so to speak. On the surface, it doesn’t look like the pandemic has affected the game much. It just took away the fans.
MLB Grade: A
MAKE UP YOUR MIND DUDE
(7/21/20) Either you kneel during the anthem or you stand. Please pick one. Some players instead chose to put their hands on the kneeling player’s shoulder. That is like the I am kinda pregnant.
Joey Votto of the Reds took a knee during the national anthem but his teammate Mike Moustakas put his hand on a kneeling player’s shoulder. Does putting a hand on another kneeling player’s shoulder mean you support him but you are not committed 100%? He technically didn’t take a knee so he can always saw he never took a knee during the anthem.
Putting a hand on a shoulder is a weak move by players. You are straddling the fence. You want to be non committal because you don’t want the public backlash. You don’t want people to think you don’t care but you don’t want people to bash you for kneeling. Be a man! Stop being wishy washy. Grow a spine and stop being a jellyfish. You are a grown man. The only excuse is if you can’t kneel for medical reason. Mike Moustakas is able to hit, run and play second base so he is healthy enough to take a knee.
Maybe what Moustakas is saying that he support the guy for kneeling but he wouldn’t kneel himself. That also wouldn’t really make sense. Moustakas doesn’t want to kneel because maybe a small part of him feel it is a disrespect to the flag but yet he is supporting someone who is going against his belief? Stop confusing us and choose one or the other.
MUST WATCH TV
(7/20/20) MLB is ready to rock and roll this Thursday with a fantastic match up between the Yankees and Nationals. The favorite to win the 2020 World Series vs the 2019 World Series winner. However, it’s not the game that I will be getting my popcorn ready and my eyes glued to. It is a game that the rest of the league and fans all over will by paying attention to. It is a game schedule for Friday July 24th at 9:10pm.
I call it the “Justice Matters” game. Some of you are probably wondering WTF am I talking about. I am talking about the big showdown in the state of Texas. Seattle Mariners at the Houston Astros. We cannot forget nor can we forgive cheating.
Miguel Gonzalez of the Mariners needs to “do his job” (thank you Bill Belichick for those words of wisdom). The catcher should not even bother putting down a sign. Gonzalez needs to drill the very first Houston batter. It will likely be George Springer. If after drilling Springer and the umpire does not issue warning, Gonzalez should drill the second Astros also. At that point, 99% there will be a warning. For the rest of the game, the Mariners should just bring in their worst relievers and start drilling Astros players. There might be a record set for the number of ejections in a single game. I set the over/under at 9 Seattle pitchers. Every batter for the Astros need to be hit once.
Don’t let us baseball fans down Seattle! You are not going to win this game on the scoreboard. Your team stinks but you can win the hearts of baseball fans across America!!
CAN I COME HOME YET?
(7/19/20) Home is where the heart is. It sound so beautiful and sweet. Well, for the Blue Jays the door is not open. There is a sign hanging on the door that says “Go Away”. No baseball field for you!
For the time being, the Toronto Blue Jays will be the first MLB team to be homeless. They are not welcome home. The Canadian government will not allow the Jays to play at Rogers Centre. This was a decision to protect Canada from more infections from the virus.
The Canadian government deserve an applause for making a stand against a billion dollar organization. Sports is not a necessity at the moment. It is a want. A want can wait. I want a billion dollar but I am going to have to wait till my next life.
Canada can benefit economically with the Blue Jays playing but unlike the US their economy can wait. They are taking a wait and see approach. Let the other teams play and see what happens after a few weeks. Why jump head first into the pool without checking how deep the water is. No one is going to complain in Canada that infections are low.
Selfishly we want to see sports. We want these guys to go play and take the risk while we watch it from the comforts of our couch. This would not be possible if these athletes were not paid millions.
FICTIONAL SOUNDS
(7/17/20) Many moons ago, I bought a Rolex for $200 and thought I had the deal of the century. Upon closer examination of the the word “ROLEX ” on the face of the watch, it actually says “RULEX”! .It was a fake! I felt cheated. MLB is about to do the same thing to its fans. First we have fake fans, now MLB is going to have fake crowd noise.
Forget about generating fake crowd noise. Forget about giving the fans the same look. If the noise is to give players motivation then these athletes are pathetic. If they are not motivated by the millions they make then they should just opt out and stay home. The fans watching at home don’t care about the crowd noise “special effect”.
MLB should instead focus on trying something different. Baseball has this image of being a boring and slow moving game. This would be good time for a “change up”. They are going to have the stage all to themselves next week. MLB will play its first game of the season. All eyes will be on them for one night. People will be interested in seeing what the game looks like. MLB needs to make this game interesting. Be bold, don’t just give us a regular broadcast.
Here are some ideas. Put a mic behind home plate. Let us hear a Gerrit Cole fastball slicing through the air and the pop it makes hitting the catcher’s mitt. Let us hear the loud crack of the bat when Aaron Judge center up a fastball. Play the players’ walk up music and let everyone hear it. The fake crowd noise is going to drown these sounds out.
If MLB does what is suggested above they will have the highest rating ever for a regular season game. The virus might even watch the game next week out of curiosity and give humanity a one day break before going back to infecting more people.
EVENING THE ODDS IN BASEBALL
(7/3/20) An advice for young people trying to avoid jail time. Do not steal. Stealing is bad. However, teams in baseball should employ a new strategy and bring back the art of the stolen base. All or nothing is the current MLB philosophy. Swing for the fences but against top pitchers you will be swinging out of your shoes. Great pitching often will win out over great hitting. Offenses need to even out the odds. It’s time to win the mental game utilizing speed.
You never want a pitcher such as Gerrit Cole or Jacob Degrom zoned in and in rhythm. Teams need to purposely interrupt that rhythm and make him uncomfortable. This is where teams need to modify their roster and have two players on the team that is a threat to steal 70+ stolen bases. Think of players like Rickey Henderson and Vince Coleman.
The fun starts when you have these guys on base. You want them to “dance” and distract the pitcher to get him off his rhythm. No rhythm, focus suffers. You want to take big leads and fake as if you are going. You want to make a guy like Gerrit Cole hold the ball, make him step off and make him throw to first. If he choose to ignore you then steal second base. Once on second base, do the same thing. Gerrit Cole not paying attention to you on second base? Steal third base. Now we have Gerrit Cole where we want him. Game changes when there is a runner on third. Pitchers are hesitant to throw certain pitches fearing a pass ball will get the runner home. A pitcher without all his pitches at his disposal is not as dominant. You have just even out the odds between batter and pitcher!
I SEE FAKE FANS
(6/26/20) I always commend people for thinking “outside the box” but sometimes when you think “outside the box” it seems like you have been literally living outside in a cardboard box too long, you are hungry and is not thinking straight.
We had to deal with “fake news” but don’t worry sport fans you are not going to be left out. We will now have “fake fans”.
The San Francisco Giants is thinking about asking their season-ticket holders to send in an image of themselves. These images will then be converted into waterproof cutouts. These cutouts will then be place in the stands. You then basically have “fake fans” in the stands. If you are not a season-ticket holder, you can do the same for a fee of $99.
The question I have is can I send a picture of me shirtless in my underwear? Can I send in a picture of me sticking out my tongue? Can I send a picture of me wearing a dress if I am a guy? Do these cutouts have to social distance? I don’t want to stand next to someone who is coughing.
This is kinda silly but would make watching the game interesting when the camera would zoom in at these cutouts of people. It will also be like an episode of the twilight zone. Imagine if you are a hitter and staring out into a sea of cutouts and getting freaked out. No, Bryce Harper that “guy” in the 3rd row did not call you a clown since the first inning.
This idea is so out of there that I really want to see it happen. I change my mind, whoever thought of this is an absolute genius even though they stole the idea. One final question. Can I have my cutout lining up to use the bathroom?
60
(6/18/20) Question: What does Nicholas Cage and MLB’s proposed 60 games have in common? Answer: They are both going to be gone. The numbers of games keep going down. MLB and MLBPA (Major League Baseball Players Association) started with a proposal for a 89 game season and as of today that number is down to 60. Both sides are still fighting over money and safety issues. The biggest is potential grievances (the virus) from the players and owners want players to waive that.
The public is already sick and tired of hearing these players and owners fighting over money. In terms of safety, only players, coaches, staff and families are pretty much on site. They are also being tested regularly. Why are they still so worried? Are they saying they can’t even trust themselves? Maybe that is the issue. Some players simply cannot help themselves, will get careless and infect the whole team.
Let’s just make it easy for these millionaires and billionaires. Let’s recommend a 1-game season. Yes, you heard it correct! One 9-inning game and that will be the season. What about the playoffs and World Series you ask? Let’s take a brand new shiny piece of paper, rip it up into 30 little pieces and for each piece, write the name of each team on it. We then would crumble up the little pieces of paper and put them into a hat (preferably a baseball hat) and shake it a little. You then set up a pay per view for $39.99. The pay per view will last for approximately 5 seconds. Sorry, No refunds! All proceeds from the pay per view are split 50/50 between the owners and players. God forbid if they have eat less than an 8 course meal on a daily basis while Americans are munching on bread and water during this pandemic. Whatever name Rob Manfred pick out of the hat will be the 2020 World Series winner. Problem solved!!
Congratulations to the Baltimore Oriole for wining the 2020 World Series!!!
HOUSTON, WE STILL HAVE A PROBLEM
(6/9/20) While MLB owners and players are still fighting over the issue of money, let’s assume there will be a season. Let’s visit a topic that was discuss all winter of last year. The number of times Astros players will get hit this upcoming season. Many things have happened since last winter so the question remains whether or not teams are still going to “accidentally” hit Astros players. Vegas set the line at 83.5 times an Astros will get hit. Yu Darvish alone should drill 10 Astros if the Cubs ever play the Astros.
Are teams like the Yankees still holding a grudge? Does Aroldis Chapman drill Jose Altuve at first opportunity? Astros players are quietly wondering about this too. These Astros players need to be drill or else they will feel they got away with grand larceny which is the World Series trophy.
George Springer, Carlos Correa, Yuli Gurriel and especially Alex Bregman are probably the four most cockiest players on the team. How good are these guys really if you take out the cheating. If you get 50 extra hits during the season because you know a fastball is coming it certainly is going to pad your stats. Your batting average will look pretty good and so does your home run totals. Teams cannot let the cheating scandal slide because of whats happening in the world. First pitch of the season to an Astros should be a 95 mph fastball to the back. Leading off for the Astros…George Springer. 1 hit by pitch..more to come…
ANCESTORS OF MLB PLAYERS
Gabe Kapler: ‘tremendous challenge’ to stop spitting when baseball returns
(5/19/20) MLB wants no spitting for the proposed upcoming MLB season. According to Gabe Kapler, good luck in trying to get players to stop spitting. Spitting has become like a reflex for MLB players. Imagine if these guys play basketball. Are you saying the won’t be able to contain themselves and spit all over the basketball court? There are no buffets at the moment but I would not want to go to a buffet knowing a MLB player was there for 2 hours.
MLB PROPOSED PROTOCOL
Players must wear masks while in restricted areas “except while on the field or engaging in other strenuous activities”
(5/17/20) Players don’t need to wear mask on the field? Let’s look at a situation. A batter hits a ball into the gap. He is smelling a triple and bust his tail out of the box. He is playing in the Texas heat with temperature in the upper 90’s. He dives into third on a close play with the 3rd baseman making the tag. He gets up breathing hard and spit is flying everywhere. If the batter has Covid-19, congratulations, now the 3rd baseman is now infected.
MLB PROPOSED PROTOCOL
A ball will be thrown away after it is touched by multiple players, and throwing the ball around the infield will be discouraged
(5/17/20) MLB will go through a ton of baseball if this is the case. This is going to be happen ALL THE TIME . Pitcher throws ball to catcher. That is 2 players touching the ball so they will have to get the ball out of play. Pitcher throws the ball, batter hits it and gets fielded. That is 2 players touching the ball. Throw the ball out of play again. There is no situation when the ball is touch by just 1 player or person except when its a foul ball into the stands. A foul ball into the dugout? So players, coaches, staff in the dugout will just leave it where it is?
BLAKE SNAIL, HIS BRAIN IS SLOWER THAN HIS MOUTH
“Y’all gotta understand, man, for me to go — for me to take a pay cut is not happening, because the risk is through the roof,”
“No, I gotta get my money. I’m not playing unless I get mine, OK? And that’s just the way it is for me”
(5/14/20) Blake Snell’s publicist is drafting his apology statement as we speak. I give it 3 days tops. He is going to apologize for being insensitive to all the Americans that are struggling financially. It will just be an empty apology and we all know its just lip service.
Snell is scheduled to make $7 million in 2020. They are asking him to take a pay cut this year not next year when he is due to make 10.5 million. In terms of baseball, he plays a position that is consider the least risk when it comes to Covid-19. He has minimal contact with the other players. He pitches once every five days. On days he is not schedule to pitch, maybe he doesn’t even have to show up at the ballpark.
Congratulations Blake! You are now the newest member of the Spoiled Athlete Club. The Astros organization would like to send you a gift basket for opening your mouth.
LET’S TALK MONEY
(5/12/20) Fans are getting excited about MLB starting up in July. It will be a welcoming site for sure. Before it becomes a reality, owners and players need to compromise on the issue of money. This is going to be a sensitive issue with what is going on in the world.
Players want their salaries prorated while owners want to give the players 50% of the revenue from the proposed shorten season. The owners’ stance is that the games are most likely going to be played without fans or very very limited fans.
Who is the pressure on? It is on the players. Athletes constantly says the fans are important and they play for the fans. We all know the world has changed. Players need to sacrifice a little for the time being. Players are just making less money for this season and then who knows about the future. What if players have 3 exotic cars they have to make payments on? You want them to stop drinking Cristal like water? How dare you expect them to get by on 50k a month!!
The fans are not going to want to hear stories like these. The fans that these athletes supposedly love are struggling to come up with even just a couple of hundred to take care of their families. Play ball or just get off the field and don’t expect fans to be there when things do get back to normal.
BASEBALL ON THE HORIZON?
(5/11/20) MLB is starting to make plans for the possibility of a 80 games season with expanded playoffs. Of all the 4 major sports, MLB has the best chance of making it happen. Players are already spaced apart and their is minimal contact except when a tag play is on, a stolen base attempt or 2 players going for the ball. Players are already wearing helmets and hats so adding a face shield to it should not be difficult.
The longest time 2 players are within 6 feet of each other will be when the first baseman is holding the runner at first from getting a big lead. This would also be a good time to try machines behind the plate calling balls and strikes. Its been used in the minor league so let’s put it to the test. What’s left is to work out the schedule with minimal travel.
TIME TO BRING IN THE MACHINE
5/11/20) If we do have baseball this year it would be a good time to introduce a new concept to baseball and perhaps also speed up the game. It’s time to promote Robo-Ump from the minors into the Majors.
Imagine no more bias in calling balls and strikes. No more players getting upset with a called strike and stepping out of the box. The umpire will still be back there. He will get a signal from the machine and just call out whether its a ball or strike. He will also be in position for tag plays at home plate and to remove balls out of play for balls that hit the dirt. On a shorten season, what is there to lose?
